Look for the positives

As a parent of a premature you get used to hearing lots of different reactions when people find out. Some people are genuinely caring and supportive (these are very few and far between, unless they also happen to be a premmie parent!) others know exactly how you feel, why, their cousin had a baby that spent a few days in NICU, so of course they know how I as a parent of a 27 weeker who spent 3 months NICU feels. The kind that you encounter most frequently are the people who really don't know what to say and clearly don't want to carry on the conversation, so they say the first positive thing they can think of while they are busy trying to work out how to get out of the situation!
So here is a list of the oh so helpfully positive things I have been told about having a prem baby

1. Oh bless, so cute and tiny - really? have you ever seen a prem baby, because although they are obviously beautiful to their parents, they are weird looking, kind of like aliens!
2. You must save a fortune on clothes - yes, my baby staying in the same size clothes for six months because she doesn't put on weight doesn't actually worry me because it's saved me some money.
3. You've got a built in babysitter (while the baby is still in hospital) - because the first thing you want to do while your baby is in intensive care is go out clubbing!
4. You can catch up on sleep (while the baby is in hospital) - sleep? what's sleep? because I for one didn't get much during the whole three months.
5. You're so lucky for not going full term - I would rather have gone a month overdue than watch my baby have to go through all the trauma of being early.
6. You're so lucky for not having labour - again, give me labour for a week rather than have an early baby.
7. You've lost lots of weight - stress, coupled with practically inedible hospital food, best diet I know!

Ok, so I realise that I may be coming across as a little bitter when people are just trying to be friendly, but it is really difficult to keep a smile on your face while these things get said to you, no matter how well intentioned they are. I manage most of the time, I have the occasional slip, but for the whole I keep a polite smile on my face then quickly move away, but one day, I don't know when, one day I will not be able to keep the polite smile on, and who knows what will happen then....

The Princess Returns....

And this time she's bought back up... In the form of little sister Elsie. 

Between the two of them they have firmly reminded me of exactly who is boss in our household, and it isn't me! Heidi has tonsillitis again, and has gone back to her regal ways of lying on the sofa making demands, although she's not quite as dramatic as before, no angel to watch over her this time. Elsie, who after watching Heidi's masterclass before decided she would give a go as well. So she developed bronchiolitis... this was not supposed to happen, Elsie is my easy baby, Heidi is the one who has the ambulance and hospital obsession. Ok, so it's only a mild case, and we managed to smile sweetly enough at the out of hours doctor that she decided we could go to the local A & E on our own, without the ambulance. Once there it was just a case of sitting and waiting, her sats, heart rate and resp rate were all borderline, so we waited until they were just under or over what they needed to be and off home we trotted. On the way out I realised, I don't know the way out, I was so used to being transferred over to the childrens ward from A & E that I didn't know where to go! Realising we'd had a lucky escape I walked as fast as I could out of there, before they called us back.

Heidi and Elsie have spent the days since this crying out their demands, being waited on hand and foot, with tempting foods and lots of entertaining. 

I love my girls to bits and I'm forever grateful for any time that we are not in hospital, and I appreciate that especially for Heidi this recent illness is pretty insignificant, but girls if you're going to keep up this princess lifestyle then how about finding mummy a prince to help out! :)

Princess Heidi

Heidi has kept me very busy for the past week or so, she's had tonsillitis and has used her time lying on the sofa very effectively. She has used this time to look deep inside and discover things about herself she never knew, the bit of herself that Heidi has discovered is ....her Inner Princess, Great!!

While she has been practising to become part of the royal family I can only imagine what was going on inside her head, so here it is, my theory on what Heidi was really thinking....

Heidi's guide to behaving like a Princess (and getting what you want)

1. Fake illness - For all the steps below to work it is necessary to be ill, this way mum will be feeling sorry for you. It's best to fake it so you can truly enjoy the experience without any of the pesky side affects of illness.
2. Demand waitress service - Refuse to move from the sofa or bed and insist food and drink is bought to you, and preferably spoon fed, with the drink being lifted for you. This way you can keep your hands nice and cosy under the blanket or cuddling your teddy.
3. Only eat the finest food - If you're fed up with the normal healthy junk your mum tries to feed you, simply stop eating for a few days, this will then cause your mum to try and entice you with all sorts of yummy treats, by then she will be so desperate for you to eat that she'll say yes to anything, even chocolate, crisps and ice-cream!
4. Walking is over rated - Insist on being carried everywhere, a good way of doing this is to start shaking when you stand up and say in a croaky voice 'my legs are all wobbly' works every time, especially when you want to go up and down the stairs.
5. Watch what you want on TV - Pretend to fall asleep on the sofa, your mummy won't want to move you because you look so comfy and she wants to keep an eye on you, you can then wait until your mum puts the programme you fancy on and quietly watch it without them noticing. My programme of choice was The Inbetweeners, I have learnt a lot of new words!
6. Get a court jester - Have someone to entertain you all the time, I personally enjoy watching a fully grown adult doing animal impressions and listening to their off key singing, especially if someone else is around to witness it as well.
7. Be a drama queen (or princess!) - For this I had my mother move the angel from the top of the Christmas tree and place it so it was watching over me on my sick bed, this was to remind my mum of the seriousness of the situation.

Follow these steps and you too could enjoy the life of a Princess, however, be warned, mothers have their limit, my mum lasted 10 days before snapping and sending me back to preschool, oh well, it was fun while it lasted :)